I've been talking to this girl for 4 months. Spent everyday together. During the summer I babysat her daughter, helped her move and remodel her house. Never got more than a hug. She actually was the first to say I love you. Few days ago during the argument she said I wasn't man enough to be her man and lose her number. She wasnt going to take care of another mans emotional needs. All i wanted was to feel wanted. How was I not man enough? Any suggestions how to get her back? Her daughter birthday is in few days. Should I take her present to her job with a note saying bought this while we were still talking and call me if like to talk?
Can I ask you, what was the catalyst to the argument?
I'm curious what started the fight that resulted in her saying "you weren't man enough to date her" and "to lose her number"
As I was leaving her place we had a nice long hug. As I was letting go she said don't do that. Ask what she meant. Said i was going in for a kiss. Said I wasn't, but since she bring it up does she ever want me too. Been 4 months and hadn't wanted one yet
that makes sense that you were ready to take things to the next step. the question that you need to find out is - is there a chance of her getting romantically involved with you and if there is a possible attraction or affection there? By her saying she loves you - that is something to explore. I would want to understand if she meant that she loves you in a friend type of way or in a romantic way. If there is a small opening of a romantic possibility than I think it would be beneficial to show yourself in a different light to her - ie. more independent
Also said I was taking advantage of her and the situation. Single mother with 2 kids thinking she needed me. Already told her my goal was to be a family one day after she said that. I knew didn't need me and want her to actually want me there
When she said she loved me the first time seemed like was a accidentally slip. When I heard it I was surprised and asked her to say it again as was walking back to her door. She just smiled and said you heard me and walked away
Right, well it sounds like she is defnitely sending mixed messages. On one hand, she is not denying that she loves you and said those words, and on the other hand she is communicating that she doens't want to be in a relationship. I think if she is having hesitations about taking things to the next level with you, you have to show that you are "man enough" by more assertive conversation, being flirtatious, not overly needy, and finding ways to ask about her but also show that you are doing great - maybe something has changed positively at your job or in your apartment/house? Any improvements in your personal life can help sway her in a postiive direction
I'm on disability and can't work. She was the highlight of my life
I completely understand. I want you to be able to explore this possibility with her and give it a chance. But if it doesn't work and she is not giving any more signals of romantic interest, you seem like a nice guy and it would be benefitical to move on to the next person :)
Since she doesn't want me to call or text her. Should I drop off the present with the note. That way if there is any way any feelings are there she can shoe it
I think that is a good idea. And that will be closure for you to move on to the next deserving person if she doesn't respond favorably or with romantic interest
Before the argument I was blocked on Facebook. Is that a sign she's hiding something? Was I man enough and that was a way of hurting me? And should I try to text her first?
there are many reasons why a block can happen, but it doesnt necessarily mean she is hiding anything. I think you need to stick with you plan of dropping off the present and go from there
Thanks for your help. I'll drop off the present and hope for the best.