How I spent my holidays


We broke up thanksgiving I said she would regret it. She called police said I threatened her. Loud pounding on my door I grabbed shotgun and yelled who is it. Police surrounded house. 2.5 hr standoff I came out was then locked in psych unit for 12 days. I contacted her thru my sister (I’m blocked from calling) said return my belongings or I would go to police and report stolen. Next morning police wanted to question me for domestic violence charges from September 5th I slapped phone from her hand and knocked her thru drywall (accident falling on her) she claims drywall was a shove and then claims I pulled a firearm on her. I never once pulled that or any weapon out. I don’t even think I had it with me, but have no way of proving this. Talking to lawyer next week. Feeling screwed. She is excellent at playing the victim and I am great for always getting my ass in a jam. I lay in bed at night crying because I miss her and her son. I should hate her but don’t. I fear the charge on my record, the fact people believe her, the possible jail time, loss of job and loss of my 2nd amendment rights. What should I do? Feeling like I should have popped myself during the stand off
Wow that's a really serious situation and i'm sorry you're going through this. You absolutely shouldnt have "popped yourself" when you had the chance with the police. If you are thinking about suicide at any time during the stress and anxiety of this situation, please seek help with family/friends/therapist/or crisis line. There is light at the end of the tunnel. In terms of your immediate situation with your ex, it sounds like she needs a lot of space right now and you need to give it to her. The best thing to do is to move on with your own life and implement the positive changes that you are personally creating. It is understandable to feel overwhelmed about your legal and interpersonal situations, but try not to get bogged down in negative thinking and what if's. Just surround yourself with healthy, positive people who will hold you up and support you while this is going on.