So I am in a good place I heard from him a few days ago he asked me if I was okay and he hadn't heard from me in days. I waited to respond for about an hour. after getting off from work and told him that, I didn't want to seem pushy and I was trying to let him process losing his twin boys mom. He responded and said he was okay he knows that she is in a better place. I asked him how his boys were doing and he said that they were fine and that they are their normal active selves. Then I asked him if he sat them down and explain to them what happened to their mom and I asked did they understand..... He told me that he tried but they don't get it now..... I went on to tell him that their young being that they're four years old and they'll understand and do time. I kept the conversation short and sweet being that I just had got off work that morning I told him I would contact him sometime because I was exhausted. He responded with the sure you can I'll be waiting...... My question is do you think I kept the conversation going on too long or just right. I am really trying not to mess this up. And do I wait to reach out to him or am I still waiting for him to reach out to me. And I also would like to know if it means anything if he text me at 6 in the morning knowing I was at work.....
The length seems just right; I assume you did, but it's good to steer it into a positive direction at the end. If he's messaging you, it means he's thinking of you, despite being on different shifts. (:
So what do I do now I'm still doing good things for myself I'm still journaling I've already done a month-long no contact do I contact him again or do I wait for him to contact me
That is so great to hear about the journaling! I hope it's been helpful for your anxiety. I think if you do decide to contact him, don't talk about the heavy stuff, and keep it simple like you have been. Try to make jokes, or if you come across a helpful article about what to do about the kids, you can send it to him and offer support when he needs it. Rather than asking "anything I can do to help?" you can be more direct and ask "what do you need?" I'm very glad to hear that you're still making great progress in other parts of your life too.
Okay so I sent him a text this morning and it read: hope you guys are still doing well what do you need? and he responded saying nothing right now. Then I sent him a text responding fair enough don't be afraid to ask I'm here if you need me I promise I don't bite..... He sent back a text saying LOL I appreciate it seriously...... Oh my god do you think that was a good one or do you think I overdid it a bit? I really want this to go well and I'm trying my best to make sure I don't mess up in any way lol especially when things are going this well 😂😂
It sounds like you're doing a really great job of keeping things light and supportive. From here, you should either let him contact you, or wait a day or two and send him a piece of media, and let him know it reminded you of him. You could send him an article like Christine recommended, or you could send him a funny video pertaining to something that you two bonded over. It's important to make your texts low-pressure and casual, which you're doing really well at. If you'd like more specific ideas about communication, you can always snag another advice session, too! Keep it up!
Well yes there was a bit of information that I left out in the Forum earlier. today was the funeral of his kids mom....... Do I still need to wait two to three days before contacting him again? Also I just realized that his new girlfriend is friends with me on Facebook and I noticed that she's a little on the fence about him but still very much infatuated with him...... To tell you the truth. I am a little happy but also a little jealous...... But should I keep her as a Facebook friend? Do you think that's going to cause some sort of problems in the future?
It depends how you left things off with him last time you talked. Having his gf on facebook wont be bad as long as you never reach out to her with out his permission. I recommend starting an advice session to get a more personalized plan for your situation.
Okay so since this post he has volunteered the information that he and her are not a thing and that she is just a close friend of his sister. He also says that everyone at the job loves to spread gossip which is something that I know all too well. Only thing is I found it hard to believe since she willingly shared how head over heels in love with him she is with us a few weeks back......
During our last conversation he said that he misses talking to me and I told him I felt the same way. He also told me that I can call him anytime he's always here for me.... This process is working for me but I'm still getting that nagging feeling that he is trying to date her.....
We talked about some personal issues but nothing really about the relationship just yet.
How long should I wait before reaching out to him again? I don't want to do it too soon and I also don't want to be waiting and he feels like I don't want to be there.