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I broke up with my 7 year cheating husband 5 months ago. He used to push and shove me around physically, he was a lazy ass and I basically was taking care of him financially the entire time. I put up with so much and I’m glad it’s over. The thing is he made me feel like it was a relief that I broke up with him. Like I was a heavy rock in his pathway. Which made me angry because I feel like I’m the one getting rid of a huge bag of trash I was carrying around. A month after the breakup he hit me up for sex and I gave in. I realized I was worth more than that and I lost all contact with him and blocked him off of all social media. I recently ran into his profile that said “ live life to the fullest and don’t look back to the past there’s no need to” somehow I feel like he’s trying to send me a message...smh lol. Or maybe not idk. The thing is when I saw his picture I blushed. Anyways divorce is in process and I’m honestly happier now. I made a bad decision to marry someone I thought loved me and we had so much in common and I thought he would change. Smh.The problem now is I’m afraid if I run into him I will turn red in person. Idk what to do or how to stop that from happening. I don’t want him back and I don’t ever want to see him again nor pictures of him etc. I don’t know how to stop from turning red? What’s wrong with me? Please help?
It sounds like a physiological reaction is triggered when you see him. What feelings are associated when you feel the blush coming on? Working on solving those related feelings can help, or you can try to continually expose yourself to his photos to get used to it/so that it elicits less strong physiological reactions.
I’m unsure it’s more like a shy blush. Like I’m embarrassed and at the same time it’s like a rush of anger. I usually am red faced very easily but this is unexplainable and I don’t want people to think I still feel something for him and or want him back because I don’t.
While blushing can mean different things, Most people are really good at telling the difference between an embarrassed red face, and angry red face, and an interested red face. Even though you feel really uncomfortable with blushing , the vast majority of people around you will be able to recognize it is not because you still feel something for him. Sometimes our bodies will react like this worse when we are stressed about it. If you are thinking about and worrying about blushing, it can increase the chances of blushing. If you try to remember that most people will be able to tell if you're blushing is out of frustration, not attraction, it won't feel like it such a big deal anymore, and it's pretty likely you will not blush to begin with. Try to understand that is a physiological reaction that you cannot control and that the vast majority of people know this. If you can take the pressure off yourself, you are much less likely to end up blushing, and if you do, it's really not as big of a deal as it feels like.
Wow thank you so much. I definitely understand a lot better now. I really appreciate the help.